Happy Horror Hard On At World War Z

Glasgows George Sq has a very different set of traffic lights.











Anyone else been to the Greggs on !6th Street?

































































No one seemed to be paying attention to the banners overhead, a typical presence, but read them and you'll find yourself in Philidelphia.










































Can't find the GFT on here! How do I get to Frightfest?














Stunt car.







Chips!







Wouldn't take my First Week pass.





Oh no! I've heard their coverage is shit!
























Vistiors to the Corentian Club this weekend may find themselves standing for the national anthem. It will still be full of old slappers though.

Rise Of The Planet Apes (2011)

So I'm cheating, sue me. Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes is not horror. Nor were the preceding six movies but I like to stretch my genre parameters here at the Hard On. What you think i watch horror all the time.? I am a huge Planet Of The Apes fan but the trailer for this years obligatory franchise "reboot" left me a little cold. All I saw were action beats cribbed from I Robot.

Whether 20th Century Fox have deliberately played it well or not I cannot say but that trailer fails to show almost anything from the first hour and ten minutes it takes to build up to the third act summer blockbuster action fest finale.

Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes is a brilliant piece of summer entertainment where director Rupert Wight and his writers, effects magicians and the incredible talented Andy Sirkas dare you to imagine that Christopher Nolan is not the only one who can deliver the big summer movie with smarts. The CGI on show is a tool not a toy expanding performances and lending the film adding layers of depth, emotion, character, it's a REAL movie made for a summer audience who could have imagined it?

Cleverly and unobtrusively laying down ground work for a sequel with a space mission sub plot so brief that if you blink you will miss it Fox, armed with next years Alien reboot/prequel/hybrid, are set to once more be king of the world whether it be a world of xenomorphs or a planet of apes.

Full on hard on and ejaculation for Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes. Go in Fox green light that sequel now!

Super 8 (2011)

Super 8 is a slice of Americana that non-Americans can enjoy through the filter of having seen movies set around a similar period. It is an attempt to do ET, THE GOONIES or THE EXPLORERS in a retro fashion but it cannot be these things. It is a period piece that references a continent to which I do not belong. It evokes memories of technology that did not grip Europe with the same fevour as it did the West. It is also 3 films, the Stand By Me wannabe, the alien invasion movie and the one that tries to jam these two pieces together.

For a film that relies on its young actors chemistry the story does not spend enough time with their characters nor does it let them develop. The periphery characters are reduced to being the kid that vomits and the kid that blows stuff up. There are no early scenes giving us an insight into this. Think THE GOONIES and how Data, Mouth, Chunk and Mikey are introduced with their relevant "skills" and attributes for the plot. The conclusive feel good scene for Super 8 falls down as our lead has had no interaction with the creature for it to have any meaning and resolutions seem tagged on and hurried. These are all simple structure points that any novice screenwriter will be able to recite to you verbatim. The feeling is the script that Abrahms wante to make was suffocated by the one the studio wanted him to make.

I did not hate Super 8 and now I can understand its European release delay as it's all about being a little kid in America in 1979/80. Which is still likely of minor interest to today's American 13/14 year olds also shown by the low box-office performance of JJ Abrams monster movie. I would point viewers toward Joe Johnstons brilliant October Sky if you want to see a copy of Speilbergburbia that feels like it has some weight behind it.

Half a hard on for Super 8.